Each type of Agreement has its own degree of clarity, certainty, and commitment. Agreements are manifested and remain in existence based on the emotional energy of Love, Anger, Fear, or Sadness.
When the emotional energy on which the Agreement is based changes, the desire and ability to continue to maintain the Agreement may diminish or end. The more intense the emotional energy is at inception the less thought and action is required to keep the Agreement in existence.
Love is the only self-sustaining emotional energy. Anger, Fear, and Sadness diminish and fade away if not focused on and attended to, that is why we sometimes forget we are Angry and/or Sad.
Anger, Fear, and Sadness need to be constantly reinforced by thoughts and actions to maintain the same emotional intensity as when they were first experienced.
An Assumed Agreement is realized by only one person. An Assumed Agreement is based upon expectation and does not contain certainty. An Assumed Agreement exists and is based on past experiences or evidence, and continues to exist on the Belief that the prior Assumed Agreement is still in effect. For Example: cooking dinner, taking out the garbage, doing the laundry, holding the door, etc.
A problem may occur when we expect an Agreement to be in effect and base our actions on that assumption. Assumptions: We Believe that each new person involved with us automatically gives their consent to honor our Assumed Agreements. The person who is expected to have agreed to our non-verbal Assumed Agreement may even give the impression that they recognize, understand, and consent to the Agreement by demonstrating an action that fulfills the Assumed Agreement even if they are unaware of its existence terms and conditions.
An Implied Agreement is based on events and actions that have occurred in the current relationship, and these events and actions demonstrate a knowledge, willingness, and ability to fulfill, at least once, an existing Request. Evidence and actions form the basis for the Belief that an Implied Agreement exists, and the request will continue to be fulfilled. In an Implied Agreement, evidence is available to support the Belief that there is (1) an understanding of the existence of a Request, (2) knowledge of the action required to fulfill the Request, and (3) the willingness and ability to fulfill the Request. In an Implied Agreement, both parties have an awareness of the existence of a specific request, have filled the request before, but have not yet, made a specific verbal agreement. (Obtaining a drivers license means I agree to obey all the motor vehicle laws.)
A Stated Agreement is a specific verbal or written request made and understood by both parties and clearly states the conditions, actions, timing and results desired to fulfill the terms of the request. A Request is asking for a specific action that allows for a yes or no response without judgment or expectation. A Stated Agreement remains in effect as long as the initial emotional commitment of energy is recognized and desired, and the energy remains active with both parties. When the initial emotional energy of the Agreement diminishes, the awareness, desire, and ability to maintain and fulfill the Agreement is affected. Stated Agreements are changed or ended by an overt verbal or written Request.